Those of you who will be happy to know will be happy to know that there is finally a trailer for Monsters director Gareth Edwards remake (reboot? rehash?) of Godzilla, coming to theaters in May, 2014. We’ve had posters:



A somewhat teasing photo:


and now, finally, a trailer. Watch; and after the break I will give my take on what appears to be happening in the 2:14 second clip. Remember, this is just a trailer and not the final product; so I may be off on a few things. Enjoy.

Okay, first we see some Army guy played by David Straithairn (Dolores Claiborne) giving a pep talk to a bunch more army guys with helmets and parachutes and glow sticks. Hey, wait a minute. Is that…it is…its Dave Lizewski! It’s Kick-AssKick-Ass is going to fight Godzilla! Be still my beating heart. Oh my goodness Kick-Ass and those army guys are going to jump right on top of Godzilla and beat him to death with those glow sticks. This is awesome already!

Next we see some guy with his back to the camera running down some hallway or something. Who is this guy? Well, slap a bra on me and call me Betty; it’s Walter White! Heisenberg didn’t die after all! But what is he running for? Oh, I get it; he’s got a new meth lab and he wants to make sure that Godzilla doesn’t step on it before he gets Blue Sky back out on the streets. Word of advice to you, Walter: make Godzilla a 50-50 partner.

Next we see Elizabeth Olsen (Silent HouseMartha Marcy May Marlene) holding some kid and looking terrified. I don’t know if it’s her kid or not: I figure she’s trying  to find her three sisters Mary, Kate and Ashley before Godzilla uses them to pick his teeth.

Among all this we have some shots of fiery explosions, the military, and a big hole in a building a la Star Trek: Into Darkness; and finally we have a shot of Godzilla as he rises from the wreckage with a mighty roar which, when translated, means “BRING ME THE HEADS OF EMMERICH AND DEVLIN!!!”

There you have it; my take on the new Godzilla trailer. Do you think I was close? Probably not.

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About Written in Blood

I was born in Spartanburg, South Carolina on March 4, 1962. I guess that makes me old, but I certainly don't feel that way. I still play video games and listen to rock and roll music. I love movies, especially horror films. I have a beautiful wife who is my all time best friend. She supports me in everything I do. More importantly, she calls me out on my bullshit. This blog is dedicated to her for everything she's done for me.

Posted on 12/12/2013, in Movies and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.

  1. Loved the shot of them dropping through the cloud, but there really wasn’t anything to go off :(

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