Category Archives: Films Released in 1982
THE SLUMBER PARTY MASSACRE
THE SLUMBER PARTY MASSACRE-United States-1982
Michele Michaels as Trish
Robin Stille as Valerie
Michael Villela as Russ Thorn
Andree Honore as Jackie
Directed by Amy Jones
“The Slumber Party Massacre” is a bad movie that moves in two paths from point A to point B until both paths congregate at point C. Point A is the path of the victims. In this case that would be Michele Michaels and Andree Honore and the rest of their friends and that most classic of plot devices that is guaranteed to get hot girls out of their clothes for at least one complimentary (and appreciated) nude scene. I’m talking about the slumber party, boys and girls and perverts of all ages. So now that we have that established, let’s move on to point B.
Point B is the path of the killer, Roy Thorn. Roy escaped from prison where he was serving time for the mass murder of five people. Well shoot, Roy, you are just not going to waste any time getting back to the business of killing. You’re a man who knows what he wants and what you want is to kill all those hot, young girls in their skimpy little outfits. You’re going to show them what you can do with your big, long, hard drill (PHALLIC SYMBOL! PHALLIC SYMBOL!). You go, boy! Shit, I can’t believe I just said that. Let’s move along to point C.
Point C is the point where the two previously mentioned points meet in an orgy of blood and gore. They are properly introduced; hot slumber party chicks, meet Roy. Roy, meet the hot slumber party chicks. Now, if Roy had ever paid attention when he watched horror movies, then he would know that point C is also the part in the movie where the hot slumber party chicks begin to fight back. Not very well, mind you. That’s why we also have the girl that lives next door. She’s prettier, she’s smarter and she’s the one with the machete. Did I mention that she lives conveniently next door? I like her already.
Alright, as you can tell there is no way I’m taking a movie like this seriously. The film is poorly acted, horribly directed and badly written and do not even try to tell me that the writer, Rita Mae Brown, meant for the film to be a parody of the slasher genre. I will not accept that as anything more than an excuse for a clunker of a movie that moves in so many directions and goes absolutely nowhere. But you know what’s even more disturbing? There are two more films in the series. I’m sure I’ll be writing about them sooner or later. Somebody has to do it.
TRIVIA
In the background when Kim is hurling ornaments at the killer in Trish’s bedroom, you can see the book “Rubyfruit Jungle“, by ‘Rita May Brown’, writer of the film.
Film debut of Robin Stille.
Andree Honore is the only cast member featured on the original theatrical one sheet poster. The blonde woman lying on the floor is late actress Jillian Kesner.
Brinke Stevens got her first big speaking role in this film.
Michael Villella read the book “Helter Skelter” in order to research the role of Russ Thorn.
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THE BEAST WITHIN
THE BEAST WITHIN-United States-1982
Ronny Cox as Eli MacCleary
Bibi Besch as Caroline MacCleary
Paul Clemens as Michael MacCleary
Directed by Philippe Mora
Screenplay and Screen Story by Tom Holland
Novel by Edward Levy
I saw this movie in 1982, the first year of its release. I was 20 years old at the time. Thinking back, I remember hating the movie. I hated the horrible overacting. I hated the horrible stereotyping given to the southern characters. I hated the transformation scene when Michael MacCleary finally turns into a giant cicada. At the young age of twenty as I was still discovering what I liked and didn’t like about the movies I watched, this film was at the top of my list for most hated of all time. You got all that? Good, let’s jump in the time machine and go back to the future to 2012.
Doodly doodly doodly doodly doodly (that’s the sound a time machine makes).
Okay, we’re back in 2012. I am now 50 years old and watching the film again for only the second time. Will my opinion of it have changed 30 years later? The film is about a woman (Bibi Besch) who is raped by a strange creature in the woods. She gives birth to a son, Michael (Paul Clemens). When Michael turns seventeen, he begins going through a change. He goes out at night committing acts of violence each time more badly than the previous. To the casual horror fan, he’s slowly turning into a giant bug, a cicada. Metaphorically speaking, he’s on the search for his sexual identity and his first piece of ass. My wife said I would lose half my female readers with that last comment. I don’t mean to sound sexist and I hope that I am far from it. I just felt that the term was more in keeping with the tone of the film.
The Beast Within is directed by Philippe Mora, the same director who gave us The Howling II: Your Sister is a Werewolf. The most memorable part about that film was the repeating shot of Sybil Danning ripping off her toga and standing butt naked. If you’ve ever seen Sybil Danning, you know why that’s a good thing. Again, I am not being sexist, Sybil is a beautiful woman and that’s all there is to it.
The best thing about The Beast Within is the end because then you know it’s finally over.
30 years later and I still hate this piece of shit.
TRIVIA
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THE ENTITY
THE ENTITY-United States-1982
Barbara Hershey as Carla Moran
Ron Silver as Dr. Sneiderman
Directed by Sidney J. Furie
Screenplay by Frank DeFelitta
Based on the novel by Frank DeFelitta
It’s bad enough when you’re a woman to not be able to fight back when you’re sexually assaulted. The assailant, full of anger and rage, sees you as nothing but an object, an end to his means. Fueled by that anger and rage, he forces himself on you, pushing onto you and driving you open with unchecked strength and power as he takes from you what he wants. I’m not even going to pretend to know what that’s like. I’m not a woman; I’ve never been raped nor have I ever raped anyone. I couldn’t imagine doing that to any woman. But I can imagine the helplessness of the situation. I felt that helplessness for Carla Moran, the young woman repeatedly raped and assaulted by an unseen force in The Entity. I felt for this woman. To be raped by some drunken, smelly excuse for a man is bad enough. At least you can get a description. Carla Moran could barely get anyone to believe her; even after her children, her best friend and her boyfriend witness the attacks. That’s the thing I found scariest about this film; her complete helplessness to combat this force and drive it away from her life.
The Entity is based on a novel by Frank DeFelitta. DeFelitta in turn based the novel on the real life Carla Moran and her case of demonic sexual assault in Los Angeles in 1976. At the end of the film, after the final scene, a scrolling marquee tells you that she lives in Dallas, Texas and is still assaulted to this day (the film was released in 1982). I felt for Carla Moran as I watched the film. I was scared for her and I pitied her. There are moments in the film where I felt a chill run down my spine and a feeling of dread would come over me. Not even her own house was safe haven for this woman.
If I had watched the film when it was first released, I don’t think I would have appreciated it. There’s no blood, no gore, no masked man with a machete. But there is fear, helplessness and utter dread. To be honest, I’ll take my chances with the guy with the machete.
TRIVIA
The real-life Carla Moran’s teenage son described a particularly vicious attack in which Carla was thrown by the malevolent force and hit her head. He tried to intervene, but he was also thrown, breaking his arm. In the filming of the movie, the actor playing the son broke his arm in that scene, and the curtains tore from top to bottom without explanation.
Robert MacNaughton auditioned for a role for this film, after being asked because the casting director saw him in an off-Broadway play, in New York.
For the scenes where the entity disturbs Carla Moran by touching her, the visual effects team designed a hot air stream’s system, pretending fingers that “touch” her body.
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THE THING
THE THING-United States-1982
- Kurt Russell as R.J. MacReady
- Keith David as Childs
- A. Wilford Brimley as Dr.Blair
- Donald Moffat as Garry
- Richard Dysart as Dr. Copper
- Richard Masur as Clark
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FRIDAY THE 13th Part 3
FRIDAY THE 13th Part 3 -United States-1982
Dana Kimmell as Chris Higgins
Paul Kratka as Rick
Richard Brooker as Jason Voorhees
Directed by Steve Miner
Written by Martin Kitrosser and Carol Watson (Screenplay) and Victor Miller and Ron Kurz (Characters)
Friday the 13th Part 3 is a new a chapter in the life of everyone’s favorite mass murderer Jason Voorhees. Not only is this the first (and so far only) Friday the 13th to be shot in 3D, it is also the very first time Jason puts on his now iconic hockey mask. They say that clothes make the man and our boy Jason is stylin’ and profilin’ like the Nature Boy Ric Flair in his new facial accessory. Our most fashionable serial killer is once again after those horny teenagers who dare to fornicate at Camp Crystal Lake. But wait, there’s more. For a limited time only Jason will not only hack and slash his way through those randy teens but he will also take on an entire gang of bikers who just happen to be in the area to get revenge on the punk kids that wrecked their bikes. Bodies cut in half, pitchforks to the gut, eyeballs popping out of heads are just a small taste of the carnage created by the man himself, Jason Voorhees.
In all seriousness, this definitely wasn’t the best in the series. It wasn’t the worst; that would be a tie between part 5 and part 8. I think what really hurt this film were the 3D effects. They just aren’t that good and they really do nothing but get in the way of the story. Jason doesn’t need trickery to appear larger than life. A guy in a hockey mask carrying a machete is going to be noticed, trust me. The acting is cheesy as hell also, but this is Friday the 13th, not The King’s Speech. Another thing that bugged me about the story is where Dana Kimmell’s character Chris recounts via flashback her first meeting with Jason. To me, it looked more like Jason was not so much trying to catch her to kill her, but maybe to rape her. It’s strange to think of Jason in that light and I’m glad none of the later films expanded on it. So, with all that I will mention that I gave the first two films three blood drops apiece. This one gets 2 and a half blood drops for bad 3D effects and a flashback that just doesn’t fit in.
1/2
