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THE SEMI-DAILY HORROR MOVIE QUOTE OF THE DAY-MARCH 23, 2013
I was trying to think of a way that I could post on a more regular basis and at the same time not burn myself out. So, I borrowed (stole?) a little from a couple of other blogs and came up with (stole?) the Semi-Daily Horror Quote of the Day. Today is the first semi-daily day and I just want to say thank you to the blogs My Two Cents for the Quote of the Day and to Book Quotes Hub for the awesome book quotes. I would also of course like to thank both blogs for their inspiration (giving me something to rip off).So, without further ado is the inaugural entry of this new feature. I hope you like it. Take care and stay scared!
From The Exorcist:
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To whom it may concern re:Dead Hooker in a Trunk
This goes out to the anonymous commenter who posted in response to my review for “Dead Hooker in a Trunk.” I don’t know if you realize this, but I trashed your comment. Not because you said anything derogatory towards me, but because of the things you said in general. Let’s review:
1. You said that my first mistake was referencing bloodydisgusting.com. You said that everyone knows that they are paid to promote crap. Well, they gave their highest rating to films like Jaws, The Exorcist, Kill Bill Vols. 1 and 2 and several other films that are considered by many to be classics of the horror genre. So maybe the trouble is that they don’t line up with what you like. Maybe they gave a favorable review to a film you hated. Who knows? Who cares? Your statement is moot.
2. Secondly, you stated that you had never seen “Dead Hooker in a Trunk” and that you couldn’t really comment on it. That means that you can’t judge it for its acting, directing, writing or anything else for that matter. But wait, there’s more.
3. The next sentence you quoted that I said I would like to see what the Soskia sisters (the brains behind “Dead Hooker in a Trunk”) could do with a remake of “Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers”. Your reply was an emphatic ‘Noooooooo!’ Now don’t get me wrong, but didn’t you say in a previous sentence that you had not seen “Dead Hooker in a Trunk” and therefore could not comment on it? Well, then that would mean that you have no reason to comment on the statement I made about them tackling “Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers”. You judged them without knowing anything about them.
4. This is the main reason I deleted your comment; if you’re going to say all these things then at least have the balls (or the vag) to sign your name.
Thank you.
John Mountain
Owner and Operator of Written in Blood
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THE DEVIL INSIDE
THE DEVIL INSIDE-United States-2012
Directed by William Brent Bell
Written by William Brent Bell and Matthew Peterman
When The Exorcist was released in 1973 it completely changed the way we look at horror. Gone were the days of the lumbering Frankenstein monster and the howling at the moon Wolfman. In its place was a frightened 12 year old girl, her mother, two priests and a nasty demon with a fixation for vaginas and crucifixes. Ever since the day that this film was released I can assure you that every film made since then about demonic possession has secretly (or not) wanted to be The Exorcist. The latest pretender to the throne is the execrable The Devil Inside. Here we have a film that wants so badly to be a horror film, and yet nearly everything about it screams out “LAUGH AT ME!!” at the top of its lungs. The scenes where we meet the possessed woman are filled with what they want us to think are scary faces and sounds, but they reminded me more of someone mugging for the camera and making fart noises with their armpits. The scene in which they take the daughter of the possessed woman to witness an actual exorcism is so much a blatant rip off of scenes from the Exorcist that I kept expecting to hear a demonic voice go “THAT’S HOW WE DID IT IN MY MOVIE! YA’LL AIN’T NOTHIN’ BUT A BUNCH OF COPYCATS AND COPYCATS BURN IN HELL!!” Don’t even get me started on the two priests. They’re acting outside the laws of the Vatican and performing exorcisms on their own, sort of like Dirty Harry‘s with holy water and crosses. Father Damien and Father Karras would have kicked their asses and sent the demons back to hell without batting an eye. Then there is the biggest faux pas of them all; they made the entire thing in the form of a pseudo-documentary ‘found footage’ style film. Ho fucking hum. If you want to be scared, watch the Exorcist. You’re just going to laugh at The Devil Inside.
NO TRIVIA AVAILABLE FOR THIS FILM
0 out of 4 BLOOD DROPS
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